austin powers penis pump that’s not mine

It all started when I decided to visit my best friend down in Austin.​ I was excited for a fun, memorable weekend.​ But little did I know, Austin Powers was about to rearrange my expectations.​

We were walking down the street when we stumbled upon a peculiar little store.​ There was an outrageous old-fashioned mannequin in the window, with a sign that read “#1 Voted Penis Rings Pump”.​ We couldn’t help laughing, of course.​ But the thought that some unknown entity put the penis pump on display only to Austin Powers enthusiasts (not to mention the locals) had us completely baffled.​

“Well, I guess you just never know what to expect in this town,” I said, shaking my head in disbelief.​

Across the street, we spotted a bright yellow scooter with a little sign that said “Rent me!” Figuring this was a better way to explore the city, we decided to rent it.​ When we got closer, my heart nearly stopped.​ There, posted on the side of the scooter in bold letters, was a sticker that read “Austin Powers’ Penis Rings Pump That’s Not Mine”.​ I couldn’t help but burst out laughing.​

My friend was as amused as I was.​ We rented the scooter, took it for a spin around town, and ended up having a blast.​ I had to keep reminding myself that I was in a foreign country, visiting a town I didn’t know.​ And yet, this strange ode to Austin Powers somehow fit in with the eclectic atmosphere.​

That night, as we reflected on the day’s adventures, memories of the penis pump mannequin and scooter replayed in our minds over and over.​ In the end, I guess it’s true that you just never know what to expect from the great city of Austin.​

Four days later, we went to the same store and the mannequin was still there, proudly wearing a larger penis pump.​ We laughed to ourselves, assuming someone had decided to up the ante overnight.​ That’s when we noticed something else odd – there was now a life-sized cardboard cutout of Austin Powers standing right next to the mannequin.​

We kept walking until we found yet another sight that shattered our expectations.​ This time, it was an entire store devoted to Austin Powers, with a giant penis pump statue out front.​ Inside, there were posters, t-shirts, and countless other items all bearing the famous movie character’s face.​

We were captivated by the scene, and what felt like an over-the-top tribute to the film.​ Even though both of us had watched the Austin Powers movies multiple times, we were surprised by the enormous penis pump display.​

The store also had walls populated with signed pictures and other memorabilia from Austin Powers actors.​ We took some time to browse through the collection, even laughing at some of the funny-looking wigs and costumes.​

We returned to the street corner where we had first found the mannequin.​ Eventually, a car pulled up, and a group of teens popped out.​ They seemed to be locals, and the one carrying a pink shopping bag had an unmistakably excited expression on his face.​ He had come to get an Austin Powers penis pump, a sure sign that these crazy contraptions were slowly becoming Austin’s most beloved novelty.​

The weekend had been full of amusing surprises, but this scene was by far the most unexpected.​ I couldn’t help wondering how the penis pumps had come to be such a big part of Austin culture.​ I mean, what could people be thinking when they decide to buy one of these things?

China Life-Like Silicone Flat-Chested Child Sex Doll for Male - China Adult Doll and Sex Toy priceIt’s safe to say that I never expected to spend an afternoon shopping for an Austin Powers penis pump.​ But one thing’s for sure – I sure do love this town!